Before you became a wife and a mother, you must have imagined a perfect family life when you decided to settle down. Joyful and peaceful daily routines with your little one, romantic dates with your partner over the weekend and a happy home to live. Sure, but most of the time, it’s not always like that. Especially the moment when you became a mother.
Motherhood is something new to discover everyday, more patience to extend to your little ones, dirty laundries, stinky nappies, and never-ending messy chores to attend to. Sometimes, when the routine is just so exhausting and we can’t take it any longer, it then affects us personally. Most of my mommy friends I asked have said that when they became a mother, they became more sensitive to everything that’s happening around them. Stay at home moms tend to feel unappreciated and unvalued too. Sometimes, it makes us feel so small that we are just at home taking care of our kids, it makes us think that we have lost the identity we built as a career woman before. I used the word “US” because I felt that way too for the past 4 years. Yet, everything has changed when I started loving myself more.
Tips On How to See Your Value as a Woman and as a Mommy
•Start Your Day With a Grateful Heart
Everyday is a new beginning. Even if you haven’t had much sleep, even if you feel groggy from waking up during midnight, still you can choose to start your day with a grateful heart. Not every mommy wakes up with their child beside them. Be thankful that you get to have another chance to set things right because you are chosen to be the wonder mom of your little one.
•Your Body is a Wonderland, Love It!
One of most mommy’s insecurities is their postpartum body. You no longer have a lean and sexy structure. It’s now replaced with stretch marks, saggy belly, and unwanted fats all over. Remember that your body has been a home to your little one for 9 months, you gave birth to a wonderful person through that body, the best thing you can do is take care of it and love it even more. Don’t worry because your kids will grow soon and once they are old enough to do their own stuffs, you can have more time to invest for yourself. You can start getting back to shape by then. As long as you are alive, no time is ever too late for that. For now, be thankful that you are healthy enough to run around with your child, that’s more than enough.
•Take a Rest if You Must
Knowing what our body needs and attending to it is one way of showing respect to it. If you feel you are physically drained and your body needs a break then have it. Set aside those dirty laundries. Do it some other time when you feel much better. Nap when your baby is sleeping. Even just a 30-minute rest can somehow freshen your mind and make you feel a little better. And at times when you feel too drained with your chores, take your baby on a stroller and go for a walk. Breathe.
•Don’t Let Other People Have a Say Over Your Life and Your Family
Everyone has different ways of doing things. When it comes to motherhood, most of those who had gone through it think that they know better than a newbie mommy like you. Don’t let that get into your head. Even family members do that too, but for me, YOU are the mother of your child. Have your way. Don’t let them dictate your motherhood journey. Free yourself from that stress and cut yourself some slack. Again, Have your way when it comes to your family.
•Have a “To-Go-To” Person to Share Things With
It sure is a great help to have someone you can talk to. Be it your Sister, your bestfriend, or maybe your partner. Having someone you can share your emotions with is a big help. Having a person who will say “wow you look so good” or “wow that’s a great meal you cooked” everytime you send them a picture of your daily life, that would really make a huge difference. It will make you proud that you are doing a good job as a person and as a mother. Joining mommy groups in social media is somehow helpful too.
•It’s Okay Not to Be Perfect
You can feel tired and drained, you can feel exhausted and stressed. It’s all part of this journey we take as a mother. We are humans and we are bound to feel that way at some point in time. But, always get back up, always! Restart everytime you need to. Bounce back every time you fall down. Don’t stay on the ground.
Every mom’s journey of motherhood is unique. No one can ever tell you how you should go through it. If you are a Stay at Home Mom and is having a hard time going through it, here are some survival tips for SAHM. https://www.mothersheknows.com/survival-tips-for-sahm/
No matter what obstacle would cause you to loosen your grip over yourself, remind yourself that you are chosen to be the mom of your kids for a reason. You aren’t a mom for nothing. Don’t you ever doubt yourself and your worth all because you don’t feel good about being this version of “you”. Remember, there is one little human looking up to you each day of his life, seeing you as his best role model. Live up to it.